I didn’t go to the pool at all this summer, which is weird. The last few summers I spent as much time as I could at the pool. This summer? Just didn’t feel it. So I didn’t do it. And it was just fine. The kids went several times with friends.
Lesson #1: Summer doesn’t have to be about “summer” things.
I love working from home and I love being around my kids. An unfortunate truth is that these two things don’t mix very well. Even with good, clear boundaries and kids who are respectful of my time and work, there’s just a lot of disruption that happens when your desk is in the living room and your four teenagers are, too. My focus suffered, my productivity dropped, and that is a bummer. But: I got to hang out with my kids more, eat lunch together (lunch for me, breakfast for them usually…), and be available to drive them to various places. I was very aware that this is the last summer with all four permanently at home. In fact, a good part of July was spent on getting all the things set up for Mara to move to her very own apartment.
Lesson #2: Summer is not great for work, but it is pretty great for family.
I tried, for the first few weeks of summer, to maintain my normal routines and targets for my job and non-job things like blogging, reading, etc. This was… unwise. I got stressed and felt bad. Finally I adjusted my own expectations, and that helped a lot.
Lesson #3: Summer has its own rhythms and I need to adjust accordingly.
Something that surprised me: I developed a pretty solid going-to-the-gym habit over the summer. I’ve been wanting to start lifting weights for a while, and have done so sporadically. This summer, I started going regularly with Zeke (who wrestles and plays football and is all about them gains). Having someone else to go with is huge. He also helped me with form and trying new exercises and weights. So my exercise repertoire has expanded and I’ve got a good habit in place.
Lesson #4: Summer can be a good time to build new habits, while the normal rhythms are disrupted.
I’m making these notes in hope that next year I can remember and be a bit more proactive as summer begins. It probably isn’t possible to a take a summer-long sabbatical, but it might be possible to book in longer vacation time, reduce my workload, or otherwise adjust so I’m not stressed. I might also look into a temp co-working space so I can go somewhere and work without interruption for the morning or a few days each week.
I can also adjust my expectations about the time and attention I’ll have for “my own stuff” - writing, reading, blogging, fiddling around on the interwebs, participating online and in groups, other interests. My children are all taller than me now. Their time at home is dwindling. It’s not a big deal to shelve my hobbies for a few months so I can have more fun with them (and also sleep more).
Lesson #5: Try to sleep more. :)