Life is unpredictable (or is it?) and mostly out of our control.

Things will happen to us.

People will make choices we don’t like.

Random circumstances will impact our lives.

You can “do everything right” and still be screwed, because life is not just the decisions you make; it’s the decisions you make and the decisions everyone else makes and all the random bits of everything that happen to you, or near you. (Or literally anywhere, according to the butterfly affect.)

Despite the complexity, which sometimes erupts into chaos, we have to find a way to build stability.

Safety is about two things:

1. Helping us feel safe: help us feel okay enough, safe enough, that we’re not overwhelmed or frozen all the time.
2. Helping us maintain stability: provide buffers between the norms/safety of everyday life and what threatens to interrupt it.

Sometimes there’s a pretty big gap: GARDEN/notes/Feeling safe is not necessarily being safe.