Category 1: A very small set of very important things that matter very much.

• Don’t argue about things in this category. To argue about things in this category is to treat them as if they are arbitrary and changeable. They are not. (If they are, they don’t belong here.)
• Take time to clarify your position to yourself so you can state it quickly and definitely.
• Establish boundaries about these important opinions and tolerate zero disrespect of those boundaries.
• Discuss these opinions only with people who are genuinely interested in learning and understanding.
• Cultivate calm, unwavering certainty rather than self-righteous indignation.

Category 2: A chaotic ever-changing set of random things that do not matter at all.

• Argue about these all you want. Be adamant. Rant and rave. Get frothy. Pound the table, stomp the floor. Have a great time. Be self-righteous and pompous and ridiculous.

If something isn’t in one of those categories, keep your opinion loose and easy. Adopt beliefs that suit you, that help you be who you want to be. Be open to learning and changing your opinion. Be humble.