I’ve been dealing with a lot of stressful things lately and seems that my ‘stress response’ is more extreme and easily provoked than ever before.
I know there are multiple factors, but I realized that a big factor is a very deep very big and very valid fear that I won’t take are of myself.
A fear that I’ll ignore my own needs, overlook my pain, dismiss my desires in order to
take emotional responsibility for others
caretake people who could be taking care of themselves
avoid conflict
not make others uncomfortable
be “good”
I’m working actively on not living that way anymore but I have a long history of it, so makes sense that I don’t quite trust myself yet. And when scary or stressful things come up, there’s a deep question: will I do what I need to do for myself, or will I pretend I don’t have needs/wants/pain?
Every day that I’m consistent in moving toward my own goals, being kind to myself, putting my priorities first, not overextending, saying No when I need to, etc. … is a day I earn back trust in myself.